Craigslist Post: World’s Most Uncomfortable Saddle
World’s most uncomfortable saddle
Date: 2010-01-01, 11:41PM PST
Like a ghastly specter from your darkest nightmare, this saddle has returned from the grave seeking vengeance. Its previous master thought it had banished it to the blackness of the abyss for good, but nay, it was only for an epoch.
*Steel rails forged by LUCIFER himself
*Genuine Auroch hide seat provides maximum chafing
I am reaching the end of my strength, as the madness contained within this dark artifact threatens to consume me. I cannot merely throw this adamantine saddle on the rubbish heap, lest some unwary passerby become transfixed by its lightless glow. No, I must only give this to one with the courage to look into the bloodshot eyes of insanity, and the strength to master it. A wizard with the cunning to master this beast gains an ally of unspeakable power: the ultimate theft deterrent. At the moment the thief straddles your steed, his fate is sealed. Eager for revenge upon mortals, the saddle will visit his arse with blisters that rival the torment of fire and brimstone… a dire lesson he will not soon forget. This same fate will befall any unworthy mortal who in his arrogance, attempts to mount the saddle of doom. Are you worthy?
* Location: Green Lake
* it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Thanks to Daniel for the tip!